Neglect That Brings Ruin

Every person has certain areas of neglect. One person may neglect their spiritual life, personal growth, or career, while another neglects their health, relationships with loved ones, or other areas of life. Even a small flaw at the foundation stage of building a house will, over time, produce a major deviation in the work on the higher floors of the building.

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“Remember that a small leak will sink even the greatest ship” – Daniel Wilczek

If you have ever been out on a boat, you probably know what it means when there’s a hole in it. It means it’s only a matter of time before it eventually sinks. One of the most famous cases of a ship sinking because of a leak is the story of the Titanic. As we know, after colliding with an iceberg, the ship began taking on water until it finally went under. Yet there were many neglected details on that ship which, combined together, led to the tragedy! Ironically, it had been advertised with the prideful slogan that “Even God himself could not sink it!”

In the book of Jeremiah we find an example of how our unfaithfulness affects us negatively. In some English translations, the word “neglect” is used at this point:

“Your own wickedness will chasten you, and your backslidings will reprove you. Know therefore and see that it is an evil and bitter thing that you have forsaken the LORD your God, and that My fear is not in you, says the Lord GOD of hosts.” – Jer 2:19

Among the examples of people free from neglect are Moses and Daniel, who proved themselves faithful and without fault:

“Then the governors and satraps sought to find some charge against Daniel concerning the kingdom; but they could find no charge or fault, because he was faithful, and no error or fault was found in him.” – Dan 6:5

“But it is not so with My servant Moses; he is faithful in all My house.” – Num 12:7

The dictionary defines the word “to neglect” in the following way:

To neglect: 1. To fail to do what needs to be done; to disregard one’s duties, to forget something, to let something slip. 2. To lose interest in someone or something; to abandon, to leave, to cast to the wind, to stop caring for someone or something…

Neglect appears when:

• We fail to do what we should
• We disregard our responsibilities
• We miss or fail to use the opportunities life gives us
• We leave people behind and stop caring for them

Habitually neglecting important matters creates the perfect environment for major life problems to arise and ruin our lives! These problems most often grow out of ignorance and a lack of wisdom. Many people are too shortsighted to realize just how much trouble and hardship neglect can bring into their lives.

Neglecting important matters can often give birth to MONSTERS that will destroy and corrupt our lives, as well as the lives of the people around us.

Examples of Neglect

Examples of neglect that create a perfect environment favoring the emergence and growth of major personal problems:

• Neglecting fellowship with God and the Holy Spirit, for example through a lack of prayer or by tolerating sin.
• Neglecting to build relationships with family members, for example neglecting your relationship with your spouse or ignoring a rebellious teenager.
• Neglecting to care for your health, for example by disregarding a doctor’s advice or having poor eating habits.
• Neglecting your finances, for example by taking on unwise debt and failing to meet your obligations.
• Neglecting education and personal development, for example by never improving your professional skills.
• And others…

Because of neglect, people lose their fortunes, fall into debt, lose relationships with loved ones, lose their health, and sometimes even lose their lives. Because of neglect, people fail to seize opportunities and miss out on chances in life. Because of neglect, families fall apart, friendships end, and people slide onto life’s side track. Although neglect may seem insignificant, it can unleash a cruel force in a person’s life and set off a chain of unfortunate events that will be difficult to stop.

The Example of David

David was an extraordinarily successful man. Even as a teenager he was chosen and anointed by God to be king over Israel. He was an outstanding warrior and commander. He killed giants and led successful military campaigns. He was a ruler who expanded the borders of his kingdom. Year after year he grew in strength. On top of that, he was a poet, a musician, and even invented musical instruments. He had a close relationship with God. And yet even a man like this allowed serious neglect into his life, which in turn led to serious problems within his family and within the nation of Israel. As a result, not only David suffered, but also his family and many of the citizens of his kingdom. Thousands of people lost their lives.

It is not worth being a “giant” in only certain areas of your life while being a dwarf in all the others!

For this same reason, churches also develop poorly when they put all their emphasis on a few chosen elements while forgetting about the rest.

“It happened in the spring, at the time when kings go out to battle, that David sent Joab and his servants with him, and all Israel; and they destroyed the people of Ammon and besieged Rabbah. But David remained at Jerusalem. Then it happened one evening that David arose from his bed and walked on the roof of the king’s house, and from the roof he saw a woman bathing, and the woman was very beautiful to behold.” – 2 Sam 11:1-2

• NEGLECT in his career. This happens when we fail to do what we should be doing. What are you normally supposed to be doing? Are you drifting away from it? Are you stepping outside a safe place? You know you should do something, but…

In those days there was a particular season when kings normally went out to war. But that year, David decided to neglect this duty. It’s striking what “happens” to us when we truly allow neglect into our lives. David committed adultery with Bathsheba and had her husband murdered in his scheme.

• HARDENING OF THE HEART – neglecting spiritual life.

It’s not as though David had no time to repent! How much time passed? Nine months passed, because his wife bore him a son right after the prophet Nathan confronted him. David allowed his sinful life to remain hidden for such a long stretch of time that his heart grew hard and his relationship with God broke down.

“And when the wife of Uriah heard that Uriah her husband was dead, she mourned for her husband. And when her mourning was over, David sent and brought her to his house, and she became his wife, and bore him a son. But the thing that David had done displeased the LORD. Then the LORD sent Nathan to David, and he came to him…” – 2 Sam 11:26-12:1

• FAMILY NEGLECT AND FAILURE TO CONFRONT HIS SON. David failed to deal with the conflict between his sons, Amnon and Absalom.

The family situation overwhelmed him, and it led to tragedy. Every family has problems, but responsible people cannot simply stand by and do nothing. They cannot stay silent, ignore things, or look the other way. Evil tends to grow if we don’t remove it or correct it.

-> Amnon violated his sister Tamar and then rejected her. David was furious, but he did “not hurt his son in any way” – 2 Sam 13:21

-> Two years later, Absalom (Tamar’s brother) killed Amnon (through his servants, just as David had done with Uriah). David again did not react!

-> Absalom returned from exile, but David again took no action toward him.

-> Absalom seized power from David and led the nation into a civil war which his father miraculously survived. Once again David did not want Absalom killed. His soldiers killed him secretly, behind his back, bringing about the very same kind of situation David himself had caused in his sin with Bathsheba, when he had Uriah killed.

The Friends of Neglect

The friends of every kind of neglect are: laziness, procrastination, and overwork. They create an atmosphere and conditions in which we allow failures to take root.

The first of these “friends” is laziness. It’s probably the best known and most common. Lazy people are those who like being dependent on others their whole life, because it’s easy and comfortable. Such people also don’t like life’s challenges, but on the other hand they love seeing an immediate result — just not at their own expense. Are such people the worst employees? Not necessarily! Bill Gates once wrote that people with this kind of disposition and phlegmatic character are valuable to him. Whenever he wants to find the fastest solution to a problem, these are the people who do it more efficiently. For them, the prospect of a long, exhausting road to a solution simply isn’t on the table ;)

Procrastination

Another “friend” of neglect is procrastination, that is, putting off important things until later!

Procrastination – (from the Latin procrastinatio – postponement, delay) – is a pathological tendency to constantly put off certain tasks until later. It is a pathological behavior, because a person postpones what should not be postponed, and in doing so sets negative consequences in motion and significantly lowers the quality of their own life.

Among other things, the Bible speaks of the little foxes that spoil the vineyard:

“Catch us the foxes, the little foxes that spoil the vines, for our vines have tender grapes!” – Song 2:15

In this passage of God’s word, the vineyard can represent our life, and the little foxes represent everything that negatively affects it. Small instances of neglect make our “vineyard” unproductive, bearing little fruit.

“Postponing something simple makes it hard. Postponing something hard makes it impossible!” – George Claude Lorimier

Overwork

The last thing I want to write about that fosters neglect is overwork. When we get caught up in a whirlwind of work and obligations, it’s not hard to forget important things. We often work a lot and hard because we believe it’s the best path to effectiveness. Nothing could be further from the truth! When we’re overworked, we don’t think clearly. Prioritizing quantity over quality doesn’t foster growth — it fosters more neglect.

We need to learn to work and act smarter, not harder. It’s about managing our time better and not wasting it on things that don’t matter. When we bring balance into our lives, we’ll have time for everything and won’t forget any IMPORTANT matter.

Frogs and Giants

There are two types of neglect in our lives.

THE FROG (minimizing procrastination) – refers to small but significant tasks that a person doesn’t feel like doing and is tempted to put off until later. They’re like little frogs that we could easily “eat,” yet we don’t. Such things might include:

• cleaning
• Taking care of some matter at a government office
• writing an important email
• fixing a toilet cistern… (an example: Lidia left a kettle on and went out to the shop. At Ania’s, an automatic faucet in the bathroom turned on and flooded everything)
• a visit to the dentist
• having a conversation with your daughter

GIANTS (overcoming barriers) – are challenges we must deal with but can’t seem to handle. They overwhelm us. They are massive problems that limit us, rob us, and destroy us…

The biblical image of a “giant” is a “mountain.” The Bible says that we can move mountains and remove them from our lives. Such mountains might include:

• addiction
• dysfunctional relationships
• phobias
• extreme poverty
• not knowing a foreign language
• lack of education
• strong, negative character traits

Instead of shrinking and removing their mountains, many people make them bigger by piling on more boulders.

How Do You Get Rid of Neglect?

First of all, start by making a list of things that are very important and that you must do yourself. Then think about what you could delegate to others, and finally, put into a third category the things you can genuinely leave for later. What’s left at the end will be a handful of things that don’t really matter at all, and aren’t worth focusing on. Always remember to keep the most important things the most important and the top priority!

“Is it even worth striving for balance in life, when we play so many roles, each demanding so much of us? The trouble is that if we’re not guided by the principle of balance, disaster awaits us.

Most people believe they will escape the painful consequences of imbalance. That’s living a lie! It will come back on them in a thousand different ways. I agree with Gandhi’s words: “A man cannot do right in one department of life whilst he is occupied in doing wrong in another department. Life is one indivisible whole.” You can’t ignore your family while working 18 hours a day and expect wonderful family results. You can’t squander your time on social media without paying for it with your health and your productivity at work. Forgive me, but that’s not how reality works.” – Stephen R. Covey

“Many people seem to think that success in one area can compensate for failure in another. But can it really? (…) True effectiveness requires balance.” – Stephen R. Covey

Stop sometimes to critically reflect on your life.

“The unexamined life is not worth living” – Plato

• Stop sometimes to critically reflect on your life.
• Pause for a moment now and then and consider what the people who matter to you think about you (family, friends).
• Choose a few people to whom you’ll give the right to correct you and speak into your life.
• Stop sometimes to consider what God thinks about you.
• Fix the mistakes that can still be fixed!
• Learn to recognize the seasons of your life and to guard your priorities.
• Balance is the key to a successful, victorious life!
• If you only ever do what you feel like doing and what gives you pleasure, you can derail your entire life.
• A small leak, if not patched, will sink even the greatest ship!
• Be aware that sin will take you further on the journey than you ever wanted to go!

For want of a nail the shoe was lost,
for want of a shoe the horse was lost,
for want of a horse the battle was lost,
for the failure of battle, the kingdom was lost —
and all for the want of a horseshoe nail.”

Agatha Christie

Are you ready to face the truth about your life and set your neglected areas in order?

Also read “How to Believe and Live by God’s Values?“

Based on an outline by Andrzej Mytych, “The Beauty of a Balanced Life.”